A Year With God, Day 5 of 366

“In the absence of any other proof, the thumb alone would convince me of God’s existence.”
Sir Isaac Newton.

I have always been fascinated by this quote.  And the more I think about it, the more I realize it's true.  The thumb is a remarkable creation.  Just looking at my thumb and watching it move in response to my will, without my having to think about it . .  what a feat that is. 

So here are some more observations about the thumg:

The thumb is what separates us from the animals.  Opposable thumbs give us the ability to grip tools, which allows us to build things.

A person can be identified by his or her thumbprint.  Think about that, the imprint of maybe a square inch of skin, out of the entirity of someone's body is enough to identify him or her.

You can use your thumb to signal many things-- Approvale (thumbs up), Disappoval (thumbs down), the kill-it gesture (thumb across the throat), you can indicate direction, you can flag down a ride using only your thumb.  You can use your thumb to work the controls of a video game console, or an electric wheel chair.

God works miracles in big ways, but He also works in small ways, too.  As evidence, I give you-- the thumb.

A Year With God, Day 4 of 366

Today, I started thinking about Judas.

He sold Jesus out for 30 pieces of silver, and is often referred to as if he were the ultimate sinner.  I find him rather sad, actually.

He probably thought, 'Oh, well if I don't tell the Romans where Jesus is, someone else will.  It's not as if He is trying to hide or anything.'

And I imagine he also had the idea that Jesus would miraculously escape capture.  He'd seen Jesus perform many miracles, after all-- healing the sick, feeding the hungry, walking on water, even raising the dead.  Judas might even have thought that Jesus could argue his way out of any charges.  Jesus did have a way with words, and he knew the Bible like no one else (even though this was technically before the Bible existed).

So Judas told the Roman soldiers where to find Jesus, and Jesus was arrested, tried and ultimately crucified.  And afterwards, Judas bought a field with his thirty pieces of silver, and hanged himself out of guilt and fear.

I have heard it said that Judas went to Hell for betraying Jesus.  I don't think that's entirely accurate.

It says in Ephesians 4:30, 'Do not grieve the Holy Spirit.'  It is said that doing so is the only unforgivable sin.  What grieves the Holy Spirit is the failure to believe in God's power.

I do believe Judas grieved the Holy Spirit, not by his betrayal of Jesus, but by his failure to believe that it could be part of God's plan, by his failure to turn away from his sin of betrayal.

Peter denied knowing Jesus three times, but he was turned back from that denial, and later spoke boldly on Jesus' behalf.  Paul persecuted Christians and even stood  watching as Stephen was stoned, making him an accessory to murder, if not a murderer in deed.   And he repented, and became a great advocate for the very Christians he once persecuted.

So, what is the difference between these two men and Judas?  They were turned from their sin by a pretty serious sign from God. 
Perhaps Judas received such a sign and ignored it.  Perhaps he gave up before God sent him a sign, which is a very sad sign indeed.  Perhaps Judas couldn't face the other disciples. 

I think, though, that he somehow thought he'd messed up God's plan.  What a strange mixture of despair and hubris that must be-- to think that a mere human could counter all the omnipotent power of God.  The ironic thing about it is, if Jesus had not been betrayed, then he would not have been arrested and crucified, which provided the sacrifice to blot out every one's sin.

By doing so, he proved himself more doubting than Thomas, and that is what would send him to hell, not the betrayal itself.

And yet, if Judas had not betrayed Jesus, I know that God would have brought things about another way.  Someone else might have betrayed him, or the soldiers might have just run across Jesus randomly in the street one day.

I think that destiny is not so much God controlling what we do, but rather God knowing what we will do in advance.  Is it really fate, if it would have happened any way?

Perhaps, before he took that final step, Judas asked for forgiveness, just as the thief on the cross beside Jesus.  If he did so, I am confident that he was forgiven and I will see him in Heaven someday.

I hope that is the case, because God will forgive even the worst offenses, and that is comforting to me, as I know my own sinful heart.

A year with God, Day 3 of 366

There is a concept that Heaven is full of people with halos and wings and harps, sitting on clouds in white robes, plucking their harps and maybe chanting or humming.

I don't think that's what Heaven is like at all.  \

Jesus says, "In my Father's house there are many rooms."

To me, 'many rooms' means that everyone in Heaven will have a place to be his or her self.  There is room for all of us to be what we can be.  There will be kitchens for those that love to cook, and orchestras for those that love to play music, and sports arenas for those who love to play sports and those who love to watch sports.

If God went to all the trouble of creating the world, and each person that lives in it, and giving each of us different skills and interests and abilities, how is it logical to assume that He would want Heaven to be full of identical people all doing exactly the same thing, day after day for eternity?

If we praise God with every act we do, then Heaven can be full of praise of a million different kinds.

What will make Heaven Heaven is that we will truly be able to interact without anger or fear or hurt feelings.  There might still be disagreements, but without the kind of anger and irritation that leads to fights and wars.

One philosopher might say, "God is like a tree."
Another might say, "No, God is like a river!"
And Jesus will come up behind them and laugh and say, "God is like both."
And the philosophers will think about it, and nod and laugh.

Heaven will be a place where we can learn to be anything and everything we have ever dreamed of being.  We will not be constrained by lack of ability or lack of time.  I could spend a thousand years learning about physics, and another thousand learning to play the piano.  Becaue to me, learning is a joy, and joy is a gift from God.

Most of all, Heaven will be full of more opportunities to praise God and learn about Him that we could ever imagine here on earth.

A Year With God, day 2 of 366

1-2-2012

So I got caught up in life today and so don't have time for a long and considered post.  So this will be a quick one.

God made Adam for the purpose of taking care of the animals in the Garden of Eden . . and the plants, too I suppose.  So I think there is an inherent need in every person, to take care of someone or something, and to be taken care of in turn.

There is something so satisfying about holding a purring cat in your lap, or seeing a dog tearing across a field to your side because he just wants to be with you that much.

That's how I think God feels about us.  When  we turn to Him, it pleases Him and brings joy to his heart.  And thinking of God full of joy like I am when my kitty rubs against my legs . .  thinking of him being that happy because of me . .  well that makes me feel good, too.

In actuality then, I guess the need we have is for a reciprocal relationship, balanced with love and consideration for both parties.

And that is a very nice thought.

The thing that started it all--thoughts on Hope

Hope

            Yesterday, we read some verses from Isaiah, Chapter 40.  As I was looking for the right verses, verse 6 caught my eye:

“A voice says, “Cry out.” 

And I said, “What shall I cry?”

            Later, I started thinking about hope, and here is what I came up with.

            People talk about hope like it’s some light and fluffy happy emotion.  But I’m coming to realize that it’s not.  It’s deep and it’s dark and it’s exhausting and sometimes it’s painful.

            Hope is only one step from despair, and the opposite of hope is despondency—giving up, like Jonah did after Ninevah.. You want to just sit under a dead tree and do nothing and wait to die.

            Hope is not a kid hoping he gets his favorite video game for Christmas.  Hope is writing a check to pay rent and then having to take cash out to put gas in the car so you can get to work, and hoping that somehow you get the money to cover that check before it bounces.

            It occurred to me that might be how the Israelites felt waiting to be led out of Egypt, and I felt a kinship with those who wandered in the desert for so long, with the waiting and the uncertainty.  I thought of Aaron and the golden calf and I thought well, it’s easier for people when they have someone or something to blame.  Moses was off on a mountain and God was invisible.  ‘Fine’ Aaron most have thought, ‘I’ll give them something to focus on.  It will take the pressure off God and Moses.’  We do the same thing, only we blame the economy or a politician.  We forget that only god can see the end of the journey.  I may never see God’s plan for me fulfilled.  His purpose for bringing me here might be for my daughter, or even my daughter’s daughter.

            It would be so easy to give up and just sit and wait for the power to be turned off and the landlord to shove an eviction notice under the door.  But in the end, every time I decide ‘I’m giving up’, I find a five dollar bill on the sidewalk, or a check comes in the mail, or I get a call about a possible job, and I take a deep breath and I get up and I keep going.  And sometimes that hope feels like the heaviest burden imaginable.

            So, our hope is in God, but what does that hope feel like?  In 1 Corinthians 15, Paul talks about the resurrection, and in verse 19, ‘If only for this life we have hope in Christ, we are to be pitied more than all men.’  If there was no resurrection, then we are wasting our time trying to live according to the Bible.  We might as well lie and steal and cheat, because there is no hope without Jesus dying on the cross to atone for our sins. 

            Our hope in God should be deep and strong and it should feel like work.  The easy thing is to live as the world suggests, be dishonest and steal if you need money.  Lie to get the job you want. Chase that person who isn’t your spouse because if there is no God, there is no Heaven, and then there is nothing to hope for.

            Hope, like Faith and Love has a human definition and a godly definition.  God’s meanings always include action.  So Hope is not just a word, it’s a way of living.

            I don’t know what it is that keeps me from giving up. (Though I know there are many worse off than I).  But there is always something.  And it must come from God, because it sure isn’t coming from me.

A year with God, day 1 of 366

1-1-2012

I think I will start by trying to define my concept of God. 

I suppose I think of him rather like an author who has created a vast and complicated world filled with all kinds of characters-- kind ones, mean ones, hurting ones, happy ones, angry ones . . .

I think God is vast and deep and . . . interested.  I think He likes to watch us live, to see how we react to things.  I'm talking about the concept of free will, I suppose.  And even thought God knows what our actions will be, He is still fascinated by watching us live and the choices we make, for good or ill.

I think God wants us to have a happily ever after, but His definition of happy might not quite be what we have in mind.

In a 'The Curse of Chalion' by Lois McMaster Bujold, one of her characters is pondering the gods.  He has the idea that the gods (in the story) can't see the physical.  They can only see the souls.   So in that story, the gods were largely indifferent to physical pain and suffering.

That is an interesting idea, but not entirely accurate, even in the book it was written in.  But to God, our physical bodies are a temporary thing, and we are here to . .  maybe to learn what we need for after we finish our lives.

But the most important thing, the thing I am sure of, is that praising God takes a million different forms.  'Whatever you do, do it gladly, as for the Lord' (and I don't remember off hand which book of the Bible that's from. 

But a farmer can praise God by sowing seeds, an architect can praise God by designing a building, a nurse can praise God by bringing a glass of water to a sick person . . .  and a writer can praise God by creating stories, even ones with elves and werewolves and talking animals.

A story does not have to be Biblical or factual to tell us something about God.  Though the Bible does cover just about every human condition imaginable, as much or more so than the Greek tragedies.  And even Jesus used parables to illustrate his point.

I suppose my point is this:  if you look for God, you will find him, even if you're reading science fiction or fantasy novels or whatever.

This is kind of a rambling thing, and disjointed and random, but as I stated this is my way of working through my thoughts.  Hopefully, future posts will be more specific, and cohesive.

Flash Fiction #4--time travel

Time Travel

            Samantha stared out the window of the air flyer, at the landscape of the Southern Continent flew by.  They were nearly there.  And the closer they got, the more apprehensive she grew.

            “Have you ever wished you could go back in time?” she asked her companion.

            Carver shot her a quick glance before turning his attention back to his pilot’s readouts.  Carver took his job very seriously.

            “Time travel isn’t possible,” he told her, adjusting their course slightly. 

            “But what if it were?” she persisted.  “What if you could go back and change one thing?”

            Carver double-checked his readouts, and flipped the auto-pilot on, apparently satisfied for the moment.  He turned his attention to her, his dark eyes intent.

            “Just one thing, huh?” he said.  “Sam, what’s this about?”

            She sighed, sorry now that she’d brought it up.  Carver might only be the pilot assigned to take her to her knew school, but he was also the closest thing she had to a friend since she’d gone to live with her father.

            “I’d make my mother survive,” she said, turning her face away from him.

            Carver watched her reflection in the window.  He tapped on finger on the controls while he considered his response.

            “There are a hundred things I’d like to change,” he said finally.  “But I have no idea if the outcome would be any better.”

            “The outcome would be better if my mother were still alive.”

            “Still alive and still in pain?” Carver asked.  “Even if you could go back, Sam, you couldn’t change that.”

            “I wish I could make it so she’d never gotten sick in the first place.”

            Carver dropped his gaze, automatically checking the controls.  “Well, that’s a different thing entirely.”

            Sam turned to glare at him.  “Why?  That’s no more impossible than wishing for time travel in the first place.”

            “Your mother’s sickness was beyond your control, beyond all our control.  We just have to make the best of it.”

            “Yeah, the best of it.  I get stuck going to boarding school, and you get stuck flying me down here.”

            Carver smiled at that.  “It’s no imposition, Sam.  I like being a pilot.  I like flying you around.”

            “Well, I think you’re the only one who likes having me around.  My father doesn’t seem to.”

            Carver started to reply, but a chime from the console interrupted him.  “Time to descend,” he sighed, adjusting his headset.  “Wait til we’re on the ground.”

            Sam sat quietly in the copilot’s seat as Carver expertly landed the flyer.  The pilot never made her sit in the passenger compartment.  He seemed to like the company.

            When the flyer was safely on the ground, Carver shut down the engines and turned to her.  His expression was stern, his brown eyes serious. 

“I know this past year has been difficult for you,” he said.  “But it’s been hard on a lot of other people, too.”

            “You mean my father.”

Carver nodded.  “Yes.  It’s not easy finding out you have a daughter you knew nothing about.”

“Especially at his age.”  There was a hint of dry humor in her tone now.

“Yes.”  The pilot refused to be drawn.  “But he does care about you.”

“I’d believe that if he acted like he wants to spend time with me.”

“I’m not saying he’s going about it the right way,” Carver said.  “Yes, having a daughter makes him uncomfortable.  Dealing with you makes him uncomfortable.  He doesn’t have a clue how to relate to you.”

“Again, I don’t see how sending me to Milbyrne Academy is going to help with that.”

“He needs time.  And so do you, Sam.”  He hesitated.  “Your mother is partly responsible for this mess,” he pointed out, gently.  “It would have been better if she’d told him about you, instead of him finding out from an auto-send message after her death.”

“If he’d known, he would have sued her, or had her prosecuted!” Sam shot back defensively.  She fumbled with her harness, eager to escape.

“Maybe, maybe not.  Because of your mother’s choice, neither of you will ever know for sure.”

Same paused.  “I know what she did was wrong,” she said softly, not looking up.  “But I just can’t deal with it right now.  I need time.”

“We know.  That’s why you’re here.  It will give you both time and a little distance to get used to things.”

She looked up, a hint of a smile on her lips.  “Vid conferences before face to face, eh?”

“And old fashioned letters, too.  I even volunteer to hand deliver any message you care to send, if you can find paper and pen to write it.”

Sam leaned forward to give him an impulsive hug.  “You’re a good friend, Carver.”

He patted her back awkwardly.  “Well, you make some new friends here before you compliment me too much.”

“You think I will make friends?”

“Of course you will.”

“How?”

Carver was silent for a moment.  His eyes grew shadowed for a moment.  “Someone once told me, ‘If you want to make a friend, start by being a friend.’”

Sam stared at him.  “That’s good advice.”

“Of course it’s good advice.  It’s from me, isn’t it?” he grinned at her.  “Now let’s get moving.  I’ll grab your bags.”